So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
