I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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