OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Randomize