I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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