i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
