Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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