Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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