I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize
