i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
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