But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
