we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
