I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
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