yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
worst night to have a conscience
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
Randomize
