i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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