Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
All I want is dick and wine.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
