Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize