no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
