after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
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