wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
