What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
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