i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
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