He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
