Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Randomize
