apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Randomize
