You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
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Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
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Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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