She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
