Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
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