That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
You ate ashes out of my bong
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Randomize
