I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
