I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I have aggressive nipples.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
