Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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