I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
