Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Randomize
