I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Randomize
