lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
You have to summon your inner elephant
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
