Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Randomize
