I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
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