i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Randomize
