you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Randomize
