WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Randomize
