I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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