D3 body, D1 cock
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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