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• (516): View more from New York

  I seem to have left my pride at pride

  Fav 17 2396 949

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope

  Fav 17 943 4452

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.

  Fav 48 1393 4610

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• (816): View more from Missouri

  believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.

  Fav 40 1792 10207

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  19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive

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• (205): View more from Alabama

  I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.

  Fav 6 3442 1171

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?

  Fav 23 10428 1448

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• (212): View more from New York

  Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?

  Fav 18 2028 1046

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought

  Fav 12 3032 1530

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• (313): View more from Michigan

  Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.

  Fav 18 875 2717

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  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

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• (828): View more from North Carolina

  Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream

  Fav 13 2877 885

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• (785): View more from Kansas

  if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.

  Fav 16 1013 1536

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• (518): View more from New York

  Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.

  Fav 1 439 888

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• (817): View more from Texas

  We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.

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• (505): View more from New Mexico

  No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.

  Fav 0 857 422

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  i think i just lost a toe

  Fav 2 17 71

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