Quick, to the slutcave!
i will never coherently bang her
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize