I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Randomize
