and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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