how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
