I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
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