The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
