Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Do you remember whose house we're in?
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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